In Bed

As I lay in my bed,
One thought runs through my head.
A solitary thought of eternity.
"Exactly how long might that be?"
"Will I know how long I'm living it, in heaven?
Or will I be there in the moment to busy to think?"
And with the thought of this my heart began to sink.
"How long will I ba able to praise?
To lift my voice and words be raised?
Will God grow tired of my incesint days?
Will he kick me out,
or require me to stay?"
I tried very hard to think of something else.
But the thought kept creeping back,
with surprising stealth.
"Eternity, how long might that be?"

Ballerina

Arched feet
Slender legs
Perfect posture
Softly rounded arms
Long elegant neck
A Ballerina

Flowing fabric
Showering roses
Bright lights
Loud applause
Opening Night

Dance of beauty
tired and sore
audience yelling
ENCORE! ENCORE!

Graceful bow
Curtains close
All go home
except
A Ballerina

Arched feet
Slender legs
Perfect posture
Softly rounded arms
Long elegant neck
Sleek face
tired and sore
Dancing alone
All for the beauty of
Dance

Alone 2

Once again I sit alone.
Uneasy about the past night
Knowing exactly the source of my fright.
I came, that night, with confidence
and joy,
hoping mayby to find a real boy.
I left alone, disappointed
and conflicted.
As my ass wasn't big enough
and my shirt wasn't just right.
Compared to the other girls,
I lacked everything, even height.
True, my body isn't perfect
no body is
No one would dance with me,
I seemed to be invisible in everyone
else's sight.
So it makes me think my breast
are too big, I can't see my toes
I don't know how to dance, not even like a hoe.
And I talk too soft and low.

Alone

I'm sitting all alone and no one seems to care.
Its okay though,
it gives me a chance to stare.
To stare into their lives and see how they live.
One group seems to compete with the other
and sound comes from all direntions.
Talking and smaking between words
drimsticks rattling on the table.
Loud and quiet, quiet and loud.
Beats being pounded out on the table
Rhyms flowing in and out the cadence.
Laughing and yelling.

Untitled

I'm scared of loving you
I'm scared of being left and,
of looking like a fool.
I'm afraid your love will die.
I'm afraid that you'll be just like the other guys.
I feel vunerable...
I feel confused
I feel horrible,
I don't want you to feel used.
All I know is that to my heart I want to be true.
And my heart is pulling me,
Leading me...
to you.

Untitled

All night I lay and wait for sleep to come.
I wait for my mind and body to become numb.
I close my eyes and calculate a large sum.
Then say a prayer for the city bum.
Trying not to forget the local slum.
I try to remember just how many is "some"
Soon I grow bored and start to hum.
While thinking of something to eat.
YUM!
Wishing I had taken more tums.
Wanting to fall asleep before the sun.
Then wondering what it would be liketo be a nun.
What will it feel like to know,he is the one.
Then I feel a dream coming on...And say,
"Well, this should be fun!"

Can't Help It

There is not a whole lot I can say to not hurt his pride.
At the same time I can not hide what I feel inside.
I see him as a brother, a friend.
But there is nothing farther than that,that is where it ends.

My affection and love is only what is listed above.
As a mother would see her child.
Not as two teenagers gone wild.
That's how I feel, I'm sorry but he'll just have to deal.

Don't Know

I cannot think of what I should write.

I don't know how to say what I feel inside.

I know its deep, profound and meaningful.

I just can't get the words to come out.

Geisha

A master at her arts of teasing...
and pleasing.
She loves without loving;
Waiting to be called to become themysterious consort again.
Learning to gain her pleasure through others.
the unattached concubine masking her
emotions to say what the other needs to hear.
Controlling the circumstance with submission.
sending the bodies she touches into sweet convulsions.
Pleasing the mind as well as the body.
Provoking profound thoughts with simple words.
Providing a ear to listen,
not just the lips to whisper into one.
Gracefully, fluidly dancing
to distract one from his troubles.
Singing smooth melodies,
the notes linger in the air like her
enticing fragrance.

Me

I left my wife and kids today.
They could not make me stay.
I didn't like the way we lived...
What they said...
What they did.

I was abandoned by my husband today.
I would have done anything to make him stay.
I tried to make him happy.
Apart of me is dying.
I'm trying to keep from crying.
(for my kid's sake)

I saw my Dad walk away today.
No one knows when he will come back to stay.
What did we do to make him go away?
I thought we were a family.
Its all so confusing...
I think my heart is bruising.

Missing You

I'm missing you and how you feel.
Laying here wishing your touch was real. . .
Remembering the cadence of your heartbeat and breath. . .
Feeling the tingle of your caress.

I'm missing you and your big bright smile.
The way your lips move when we sit and talk for awhile. . .
Your soft, gentle kisses and your sensous style.

I'm missing you and your brown eyes.
Eyes that send me reeling through the skies.T
he way they peer into my soul and give it rise.

Oh Lord Who Am I

I am the child who trusted you so.
I am the girl that where you led I would go.
I am the one who stumbled and fell.
I am the one who is deathly scared of hell.
I am the person who longed to be closeto you like Eve.
I am the sould that was so easily decieved.
I am the heart that misses you so.
I am the child pleading for you not to go.
I am the person who knows all my sins.
I am the girl who wants them all to end.
I am the sould who doesn't know which way to run.
I am the heart that hates to be shunned.

Our Eyes

The gateway to our purest essence.
An open portal to our soul.
The place where all feelings are held.
Hopes and desires, love and hurt.
A picture frame of our deepest selves.
The capturing feature of our inner mystery.
Two enticing, compeling orbs of passion.
They communicate silenty.
Longing...
Wanting to be held in the gaze of another.
To peer into another's heart.
To see the essence of love.
Our, eyes...
Our, eyes.

Scare Scars

Scared and Scared am I.

Scared of the scars so these scars leave me scared.

And Im sorry I can not see the reason why...

So scared of the scars am I.

Kitchen

The Kitchen is my home.
It's where I cook with all my love.
Baking, Roasting, Sauteing, Toasting.

The Kitchen is my home.
It's where joy pours out of my stove.
Bubbles of laughter and lilting songs.

The Kitchen is my home.
It's where my husband finds an island cove.
A retreat from stress and a loving caress.

The Kitchen is my home.
It's where I cook with all my love.